Saturday, May 16, 2015

Saturday, May 16, 2015

28 When Saul realized that the Lord was with David and that his daughter Michal loved David, 29 Saul became still more afraid of him, and he remained his enemy the rest of his days. (1 Samuel 18:28-29)

Insecurity can be a life-threatening disease.  It can steal, kill, and destroy the life of its host and, potentially, the lives of those around the host.  A few of the symptoms are:

 

1.  Self-deprecation (constantly putting yourself down),

2.  Pride (confidence built upon the illusion that “you did it” all by yourself)

3.  Jealousy (seeing “the best” in others and wanting it for yourself)

Saul was a man who had these symptoms.  After Samuel prophesied over Saul’s life about his future as Israel’s first king, Saul replied with excuses why he was unworthy. “I’m a Benjamite, from the smallest clan in Benjamin” - I’m not worthy! (1 Sam. 9:21)  Yet, it didn’t take long for Saul to have a few successes and begin to become proud - so proud that he built a monument to himself. (1 Sam. 15:1-12)  And, having been rejected by the Lord as king because of his disobedience, Saul became jealous of David, his replacement, a man after God’s own heart.  His jealousy burned into anger to the point of attempted murder.  It was clear that Saul was capable of being king, but something was wrong from the very beginning.

Saul never confronted his insecurities.  The dictionary defines insecurity as being “lack of confidence or assurance; self-doubt; instability.”  From this definition it seems that insecurity is a bad thing.  However, insecurity only becomes a full-blown disease when it is not confronted by the security we have in Jesus Christ.  God was not looking for a self-confident and self-assured person to serve Him as king of Israel.  God was looking for a person like David who, when reminded of his lack of experience to fight a warrior like Goliath, responded by saying, “The Lord who delivered me from the paw of the bear will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine.” (1 Sam. 17:33-37)  David showed how insecure he was in his own abilities by constantly affirming his confidence in God’s abilities.  

There are many times when I don’t feel like I have what it takes to be a good husband, a faithful minister, or a competent leader - times when the weight of the what I’m facing makes me insecure and shaky.  I praise God that He invites us to “cast [our] cares on the Lord and he will sustain [us]; he will never let the righteous be shaken.” (Psalm 55:22)  I thank Jesus for the truth He spoke saying, “I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)  I will never be enough for what God is calling me to be and to do without Him working in me and through me.  Our victory is in constantly admitting our insecurities, inabilities and weaknesses.  But, for this admission to bear fruit it must be done in humility and faith before Our Almighty God who reminds us through Paul saying, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”  When we are weak, then we are strong.