July 4: Of Teddy Roosevelt and Ears

2 Kings 23:31-25:30

Acts 22:17-23:10

Psalm 2:1-12

Proverbs 18:13

My dad has done his best trying to guide me throughout my life.  It turns out one of the things he's repeated to me, which I still struggle to learn and to apply, was from Theodore Roosevelt: "People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care."

Tough one for me, through many stages in my life - the tutor helping high school kids prepare for a summer school final, the young professional trying to build a career, even the father of young adults afraid they will make wrong choices.  Every step of the way I've believed that being correct was enough - and yes, it was, if I was right, and being right was all I wanted.  

The thing is, I didn't just want to be right - I wanted my pupil to pass the exam, I wanted the team I worked with to be successful, and I still want my children to live full lives built on a relationship with the Lord.  For that, they need to care to hear what I say.  So what to do?

Today's reading is fairly direct:  "To answer before listening, that is folly and shame."  In my life, the times it felt people really cared, I realized they were listening to me.  They let me speak.  They let me rant, even.  I have been blessed with a sister who is particularly good at that.  I turn to her the most, and listen to her a lot.  And often I do what she suggests.   I know she cares, so I care what she knows.  

I wish I could say I was as good at this listening thing as my father has tried to teach me, as my sister has shown me, and as my pastor has tried to remind me - we have two ears but only one mouth, so we need to be listening twice as much as we speak.  Especially now, when - as we grow in our faith - we realize how important the message of salvation is, and how hard the world makes it for others to hear and embrace that message.  

Father, you know every single one of my many weaknesses.  You know this is one of the bigger ones.  And You know this gets in the way of relationship; it makes it difficult for me to let others know how much I care. Help me to listen before I speak, to learn before I teach, that those I reach out to might be willing to hear.