10/18/13

10/18/13

O Lord, God of my salvation, I cry out to you by day. I come to you at night. Now hear my prayer; listen to my cry. For my life is full of troubles, and death draws near. I am as good as dead, like a strong man with no strength left. They have left me among the dead, and I lie like a corpse in a grave. I am forgotten, cut off from your care. You have thrown me into the lowest pit, into the darkest depths. Your anger weighs me down; with wave after wave you have engulfed me. Interlude You have driven my friends away by making me repulsive to them. I am in a trap with no way of escape. My eyes are blinded by my tears. Each day I beg for your help, O Lord; I lift my hands to you for mercy. Are your wonderful deeds of any use to the dead? Do the dead rise up and praise you? Interlude Can those in the grave declare your unfailing love? Can they proclaim your faithfulness in the place of destruction? Can the darkness speak of your wonderful deeds? Can anyone in the land of forgetfulness talk about your righteousness? O Lord, I cry out to you. I will keep on pleading day by day. O Lord, why do you reject me? Why do you turn your face from me? I have been sick and close to death since my youth. I stand helpless and desperate before your terrors. Your fierce anger has overwhelmed me. Your terrors have paralyzed me. They swirl around me like floodwaters all day long. They have engulfed me completely. You have taken away my companions and loved ones. Darkness is my closest friend. (Psalms 88:1-18 NLT)

Have you ever been so down in the dumps that it felt like everything and everyone was against you? Where it felt like God himself had turned His back on you? I believe that this is what Heman was going through when he wrote this song. He felt rejected, alone and far from God. I have been through many times like this in my life. I get depressed or angry, and the joy is completely wiped from my existence. I feel like God is so far away. But what I have come to realize is that it is not God who is distant. It is me distancing myself from God. I feel alone because I am ignoring my source of strength. It is me pushing away, or not taking the advice of the maker of the universe. The way that I fight this off is routine. I keep habits, that keep me close to God. After all, how can you have a best friend if you don't spend time with Him? I know, sometimes I have to force myself into worship, or push myself into communion, but when I do, it forces the negativity out of me. When I force myself to sings songs of praise to my redeemer, I cannot stay depressed for long. Jesus is seeping back in!

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