August 1: Maria, Assunta and Forgiveness

"We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves."

- Rom 15:1

"Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God."

- Rom 15:7

"Remember, Lord, Your great mercy and love,

   for they are from of old.

Do not remember the sins of my youth

   and my rebellious ways."

- Ps 25:7

I struggle with Paul's admonitions.  Those who know me know I have been known to carry a self-righteousness fueled grudge over a long time and over long distances.  I have struggled to understand differing points of view, much less accept them - especially those that do not seem grounded in fact and logic.  The funny thing about this is, the unforgiveness with which I approach others, I find I apply to myself.  The sins of my youth, during my rebellious ways?  I cannot tell you how often I find myself thinking back, regretting what I did, wishing I could change things.  My inability to forgive others is a heavy enough burden; the consequent inability to forgive myself seems like poignant justice in its weight.  

Yet, we are called to forgive, in the same way we cry out to God for His forgiveness, and I wonder - is it really possible?  I mean, ok - Stephen asked God not hold his murder against those who stoned him, but maybe he was an exception who benefited from having experienced Jesus first hand?  Then I remember the story of Santa Maria Goretti, and of her mother.  Maria Goretti was born in 1890, to a poor family in Italy.  She died just 12 years later when, while caring for her infant sibling, Alessandro, the son in a family with whom her family shared a house tried to rape her and, when she resisted, stabbed her repeatedly.  She died, after surviving long enough to say what happened.  Her attacker was caught and jailed for 27 years.  And it is here that that Assunta, her mother, comes into play.  While in prison, Alessandro repented.  And after his release, he sought Assunta, Maria's mother, and begged her forgiveness.

PAUSE: I have a daughter.  Were someone were to hurt her, or any of her brothers, it would be very difficult for me not to want to seek vengeance.  Forgiveness and mercy?  Well, you already know, those haven't always been my strong points.  They would probably be very difficult.  One would have to have the superhuman, forgiving heart of God, wouldn't they?  

It turns out, it isn't beyond man's ability to forgive, even a sin so grievous as murder following an attempted rape.  Because Assunta forgave Alessandro.  But, it turns out, that isn't all.  The story has it that Maria survived 24 hours after she was stabbed, during which time SHE expressed forgiveness for Alessandro.  She even stated, as she lay dying, that she wanted him in heaven with her.  

I believe they chose to forgive, and God honored their choices, and gave them the ability to do so.  I pray that I remember their example each and every time I find myself faced with the opportunity to offer forgiveness as well.