August 24: Of Job, Teresa, Dark Nights and Joy

Job 12:1-15:35

1 Corinthians 15:29-58

Psalm 39:1-13

Proverbs 21:30-31

The book of Job is a tough one to read.  Having gone through it a few times, I admit I am still torn between "what the heck?!?", "please, God, not me", and "God knows what He is doing, even if I don't get it."

My biggest problem is my willingness to surrender to God's will is conditional on my agreement with His plans for me.  Surrender that depends on approval isn't really surrender, is it?  But that's me.  "I'm ok with what You want, God, so long as it takes me here…". Or "Let's do it Your way, God, so I can have this…". Or simply "Ok God.  I get it.  I understand."

We're in the middle of the book, and Job is still asserting his blamelessness, and he wants to plead His case to God and receive vindication.  One of his friends repeats their refrain - that Job is sinful, and must therefore have done something to deserve his lot.    The fact is, his friends were wrong, and Job's blamelessness was irrelevant.  

What is relevant?  Our circumstances.  Job's were excruciating; ours not as much, but they can be overwhelming.  They may not make sense, may seem unjust, may border on the unbearable.  But they are what they are, beyond our ability to control.  

What else?  Choice - of how to receive them, to deal with them.  We can choose to rail at the irrationality, or choose - as God called Job to - to trust that He is in control.  We can try to demand what we want, or we can focus on Him and His promises.

The latter is preferable, but extremely difficult.  I cannot claim the blamelessness of Job, but it still isn't easy to accept the difficult choices God may make for me.  And I am constantly in awe of those who are able to submit, and submit joyfully.  One such example - Mother Teresa, whom I had no idea suffered what she called the "dark night of the soul" - for fifty years.  From 1946 till her death in 1997, it is reported, she did not feel the presence of God.  How did she respond?  Four ways, according to Dr. Dianne Traflet of Seton Hall University:

1. She let her "yes" mean "yes".  She said yes to God when she chose to be a nun; through her darkness and pain, she constantly, persistently recommitted her "yes".
2. She got close to Christ, so she could radiate Him.  In her heart, she claimed the God she could not feel.  And so she remained close.  Imagination?  Unlikely, when one considers how many saw our Savior through and in her.  
3. Though the darkness, she clung to the tools God had given her.  Prayer, scripture, eucharist.  With and through these, she declared "I believe.  Help my unbelief."
4. She carried her cross joyfully.  Dr. Traflet described joy as God's presence in our lives.  Despite the darkness, perhaps because of her stubbornness at staying close to God, she was a person who, through her suffering, would smile.  As Dr. Traflet says, "What is that about?  It's God's presence."

Neither Job's nor Mother Teresa's suffering made sense.  But they both clung to God, submitted to His will; in Mother Teresa's case, even joyfully.   Father, we do not have that strength.  As Mother Teresa prayed, "I believe.  Help my unbelief" - so that when my circumstances do not make sense, I can face them with trust, with peace and with joy.