July 6

Psalm 4:4

In your anger do not sin; when you are on your beds, search your hearts and be silent

When I read this verse God reminded me of how letting Him work in my heart has changed me - truly in a way that only He could do.  Being silent when I am upset was never something I was good at.  About a month ago I received a text from a family member and Steven saw my face -- I was visibly annoyed.  He looked at me waiting for my reaction. He even wondered why it was taking me so long to go off the deep end.  In that moment, I stopped and asked the Lord "how do you want me to answer this?"  Much to my surprise I got no answer from God. So I asked Him again.  Still no answer.  Steven looked at me and asked why I wasn't answering the text and I told him "I asked the Lord what to say but He didn't answer me.  So maybe I should just be quiet". The expression on his face was priceless. And so, I remained silent.  To this day, I haven't reacted or answered the text.  Reading this verse confirmed what God was teaching me that day.  When we are angry and our first line of defense is to react in a way which usually will not bring glory to God, we sin. Among the many lessons God is teaching me, this perhaps is one of the hardest.  Thinking about it now, I realized that God gave me peace in that moment which surpassed my understanding - giving me strength to be silent. When we search our hearts and find God in the moments of anger, silence is golden.

Randi