April 7

Psalm 18 Clear Thinking in a Conflict

The story is told of a young man on the first day of his new job. He was a new clerk in the fresh produce section of a supermarket. A lady came up to him and said she wanted to buy half of a head of lettuce. He tried to dissuade her from that goal, but she persisted. Finally he said, "I'll have to go back and talk to the manager." He went to the rear of the store to talk to the manager, not noticing that the woman was walking right behind him. When he got into the back of the store, he said to the manager, "There's some stupid old bag out there who wants to buy half a head of lettuce, what should I tell her?”
Seeing the horrified look on the face of the manager, he turned about and seeing the woman added, "And this nice lady wants to buy the other half of the head of lettuce. Will it be all right?"
Considerably relieved, the manager said, "That would be fine." Later in the day, he congratulated the boy on his quick thinking. He then asked, “Where are you from son?” The young man said, "I'm from Toronto, Canada, the home of beautiful hockey players and ugly women." The manager looked at him and said, "My wife is from Toronto." The young man said, "Oh, what team did she play for?"

We need to be careful with our words because words can do a lot of damage in life. They are the number one source of conflict in our world. There is nothing more inevitable in life than conflict. Because of the fallenness of our world we daily find ourselves in situations where we feel attacked, criticized, harassed, misunderstood, and maligned by others. What do you do when you find yourself in that situation?

Psalm 18 shows us what David did when he was attacked.

Psalm 18:1-2 I love you, O Lord, my strength.
The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge.
He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

David ran to the Lord and asked Jesus to be his defense attorney. Many years ago I was going through a difficult time of conflict and I the Lord spoke to me through a little devotional book called, “The Pursuit of God.” Here is the section that spoke to me.

“First of all he should put away all defense and make no attempt to excuse himself either in his own eyes or before the Lord. Whoever defends himself will have himself for his defense, and he will have not other; but let him come defenseless before the Lord and he will have for his defender no less than God Himself.”

The next time you find yourself in a conflict give up your self defense and take refuge in the Lord our fortress. Here are a few practical steps to take in your next conflict:
1. Run to the Lord for his defense services. Don't run from strife.
2. Open the door with a non-accusative statement. “Can we talk; I sense distance, are you alright?”
3. Define the issue clearly. Ask, “What do you see happening in this disconnection?”
4. Speak these three words, “Help me understand.”
5. Once you have a clear understanding of their position state your position.
6. Don’t raise your voice or use put downs.
7. Keep the language positive.
8. Forgiveness is always necessary for complete healing. Be sure to grant the level of forgiveness you have experienced from the Lord yourself.

I would like to invite the team over for pizza on Thursday, May 13th 7:00 at my house. More details to follow.